Birth story Jody - Personal birth experience in Weesp

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Jody

JODY WAS AFRAID HER SECOND DELIVERY WOULD TAKE AS LONG AS HER FIRST. SHE FOUND THAT HER OWN THOUGHTS WERE GETTING IN HER WAY DURING LABOR. BELOW SHE TELLS HER STORY.

I had a fine first pregnancy. Labor was induced at 40 weeks and otherwise went well, but it took a long time. Several times in that process I had to learn that, despite powerful contractions, dilation was not progressing. Eventually, I gave birth to a healthy son. It is with an incredibly proud feeling that I look back on that delivery. I turned out to be pregnant again after 7 months with our second son (yes, I know!). The sense of pride I initially looked back on the first delivery with was suddenly gone. I recalled the moments when I was stuck – in my body and head. I found that I had not adequately processed the experience of the first childbirth, and to be honest, I then noticed for the first time that my experience was not one I felt good about. I discussed my feelings at length with the midwives. I felt supported and heard, and that created increasing confidence throughout the pregnancy.

It is magical to be allowed to experience very consciously the power of my mind and thoughts.

Jody

From week 37, I had very regular hard bellies and some blood loss. Invariably, I woke up every morning mildly disappointed when nothing had happened that night. On the day of delivery, I called midwife Nicolette and was allowed to come by at noon for a check-up and then a foot reflexology massage. From the massage I totally relaxed. I went home and slept for about 1.5 hours. At some point later that afternoon, I thought I noticed I was having regular hard bellies. I grabbed my phone and opened my contraction timer app. There were 7 minutes between the first and second moments. I thought, yes, something is going on here. I knew now it has really begun. Nicolette arrived and checked on me upstairs in the bedroom. She felt 5 to 6 cm of dilation and said it was time to go. OMG. It was going to happen. I was mostly happy and relieved. No more waiting. We were getting ready to go to the hospital. The room in the hospital with the bath was spacious and felt comfortable. My husband had bought a portable box and turned on the relaxing music I heard during the foot reflexology massage earlier that day. The tub filled up, and I caught the contractions walking and hanging. Unfortunately, the bath proved too relaxing and the contractions subsided again. I wanted to get in the shower and walk around a bit. After spending some time in the shower, we listened to the heartbeat and I was checked. Nicolette told me I had 7 to 8 centimeters of dilation and the membranes were punctured. After about an hour, it turns out that I am still 7 centimeters dilated. It disappoints me. After more than an hour of painful contractions, no progress. Not another protracted labor, I thought. I get back into the shower. I notice that I am in my head. I just think, not again. I don’t know where and how to look for it. I tell Nicolette that I’m stuck. I tell her I don’t believe this is going to work out, that it takes me back to giving birth to my first. She speaks to me motivatingly. Explains that there is progress in dilation and that I should not just stick to the number of centimeters. Indeed, much more needs to be done and she sensed progress.

There I am, the relaxing music in the background, the strong contractions every few minutes, but it feels good, the atmosphere is nice, the people, the music. Nicolette continues to speak motivationally, telling me that she thinks I am doing well and expresses confidence in me and in the process. I turn inward, take deep breaths with each contraction, as far down in my belly as I can, and exhale for a very long time. Between contractions, I do the same thing. With each contraction, I find myself doubting myself inside. Doubt that I can do it. Doubt distracts, I catch the contractions, but not constructively. I notice that everything in my body is turning upward, toward my head. I experience this moment consciously and call a halt to myself. I address myself, “I trust my body can deliver,” “I can do this,” and with each contraction “baby, we can do this together, come soon little darling, how I love you. I experience very consciously – and I find this magical – that everything in my body turns downward. It is magical to be allowed to experience very consciously the power of my mind and thoughts. I feel it in my belly, the contractions are more painful. I feel the contractions doing their work. Nicolette agrees with me that she wants to examine me internally at 10:10 pm. I am examined and appear to be almost there. How nice. Nicolette also indicates that I have several more contractions to go. The contractions come and go. ‘I am stronger than the contraction,’ I tell myself. I am beginning to notice that when I give light pressure downward, it feels very nice. I also indicate that I actually want to push. Spinning on all fours, I give everything I have. It feels nice. I press, thinking it would take a while, but after a few minutes I hear that he is coming. I am so in my focus, focused on the instructions, until I hear that he is there. I look under me and there he is, our Julius. What I have learned is to trust my body, believe in myself and be allowed to feel my own power. For what power we have within ourselves!

I am so in my focus, focused on the instructions, until I hear that he is there.

Jody

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